Yellow Butterflies

I didn’t know exactly what to expect as Colleen and I followed Mr. Hood to the cemetary. We had been saying all summer long that we wanted to go and visit…we wanted to see Kara. Now that I was literally seconds away I was extremly nervous. Holding Mr. Hood’s hand as my eyes took in their first glimps of where my friend’s body now laid was probably one of the most comforting things I have ever felt. I just stood there staring at the large stone in front of me..it suddenly represented such realness and finality. Part of me wanted to lie down on the grass above where Kara is burried, another part of me wanted to hug the stone and never let go, and still another part of me wanted to turn and run away in hopes that by doing so reality would melt away. I don’t know how long Colleen and I stayed there that day because all notion of time escaped me. What stands out most to me now was the feeling of running my fingers over Kara’s name imprinted in the stone, and then the playful yellow butterfly that flew lightly over my shoulder. Colleen noticed it too and after we had both watched Kara fly happily over the field we knew that it was time to go. Back at the Hood’s house Mr. Hood asked me what I felt like when I was at the cemetary. Despite the rush of emotions that were going on in my head all I could tell him was that I got that “I can’t breath” feeling that I get a lot when I think about Kara. Once again I was comforted by his recognition of my feeling-he knew exactly what I was talking about. That day is a day I will remember forever and always. Although the circumstances for my visit are ones that I wish I could change, I was able to leave with a small sense of peace that I haven’t found for awhile. I guess the reason I am sharing this with all of you is to try and spread that feeling in any way possible. So, keep your eyes open for playful yellow butterflies (and anything else that reminds you of the wonderful person that we all know and love). Mr. Hood, thank you so much for everything that afternoon. You have touched my soul very deeply. I love you Kara Love, Christine